Monday, January 26, 2009

it takes a little time sometimes

So on my way home from Stef and Greg's tonight, I was listening to a cd I had made. And I've had this cd in my car for a couple days and have listened to this song without thought. However, today as I was driving home, I really listened to the lyrics, and a sort of peace came over me and I realized that everything is happening as it should be. God has a plan for me and, while I don't understand it yet, it will all make sense eventually. Anyways, onto the lyrics...



It takes a little time sometimes
To get your feet back on the ground
It takes a little time sometimes
To get the titanic turned back around
It takes a little time sometimes
But baby you're not going down
It takes more than you've got right now
Give it time

What's this walking through my door
I know I've seen the look before
Sometimes in faces on the street
Sometimes in the mirror looking back at me
You can't fix this pain with money
You can't rush a weary soul
You can't sweep it under the rug, now honey
It don't take a lot to know

It takes a little time sometimes
To get your feet back on the ground
It takes a little time sometimes
To get the titanic turned back around
It takes a little time sometimes
But baby you're not going down
It takes more than you've got right now
Give it time

Now it may not be over by morning
But Rome wasn't bulit in a day
You can name this thing a thousand times
But it won't make it go away
Let me put my arms around you
And hold you while you weep
We've been talking and talking
I'm sick of this talk
And it's nothing that won't keep

It takes a little time sometimes
To get your feet back on the ground
It takes a little time sometimes
To get the titanic turned back around
It takes a little time sometimes
But baby you're not going down
It takes more than you've got right now
Give it time

Amy Grant

Saturday, January 24, 2009

tWINsfest excitement!

Believe it or not, considering how HUGE of a tWINs fan I am, I've never really been that interested in Twinsfest. I know, I know...unbelievable right?! I love me some tWINs! But it's just never something I've really been dying to go to...it seemed fun enough--but really, I'm not the type of girl who's going to pay anywhere from $5-$50 for an autograph from a player. Especially since you have to pay to get in anyways--and I know it's for a good cause but I just couldn't really justify spending that much.

Anyways, cue to the point of this post. My dad and his friend Carl were going to Twinsfest today--Carl's brother sells baseball cards and he always gets free tickets so they figured they would go since it was free. Dad asks me at 11 if I want to go..."oh but Carl will be here at 11:30"...so I decided to pass since I wouldn't have time to shower or get ready. Then Carl shows up and basically forces me to go ("just put on a hat"...yeah, because a hat fixes everything! haha). Now, I will admit, it was much more fun than I thought it would be...but it's also not something I would do every year. It's kind of like the "once you do it, you don't need to do it again" thing--unless of course, you're going to specifically get someone's autograph.

I will forever be happy that I went today though because---dun dun dun!---when Dad and I were waiting upstairs for Carl, JOE MAUER, JUSTIN MORNEAU, CARLOS GOMEZ, and JESSE CRAIN walked by us! And I'm not talking 'just walked by us'. They were literally like a foot away from us. As in, if I had reached my arm out, I would have touched them. I'm pretty sure I stopped breathing while they walked by! And let me tell you, #7 sure was lookin pretty good! Gomez wasn't looking too bad himself--although he had his head shaved and I like him better with long hair! Anyways, just wanted to share my freak out of the day....I was sooo excited! That alone made the whole trip worth it!

Friday, January 23, 2009

frustration could be setting in...

Soo...two days ago, I wrote a post and never actually posted it. I re-read it today and I'm not entirely happy but I'm still going to post it so you can see how I got from point A(my old post) to point B (my new post). Here's what I wrote initially:

I really feel like asking for help is just a waste of my time. Truly. Everyone always says God won't give you anything you can't handle. Well, guess what everyone? That's a load of crap. I couldn't handle losing one job, let alone two. I could handle the ditch but not the car accident. And ya know what, I even shelved my pride when I had to borrow a loan from someone close to me...but now this? (oh "this", by the way, is the fact that I just put $700 into my car to fix it A WEEK AGO and it won't start again). It's ridiculous. Are you listening God? Because you're making it REAL hard to trust you and believe in you. Haven't I had enough? I mean, come on, at least spread the troubles around. Give me time to recover from the last thing you "thought I could handle."



I know, right? I'm not exactly proud of writing that. But at the same time, I was really frustrated and that's exactly what I was feeling at the time--and if you can't be honest with God, then who can you be honest with? I know that whatever we're going through, God can handle it. I know that no matter how mad I am at God, He can handle it. I know that, even though I shouldn't, if I blame my problems on God, it's okay because He can handle it. And I know that even if I feel like I can't handle something God gives me, He can handle it for me. Even if I falter in my trust in Him, He can handle it. It doesn't always make sense to me. It doesn't always make me feel better. But the bottom line is, whether I feel like God is there or not, He is. And as long as I remember that, I'll be okay. It might not be what I want. It might not even be what I need. I may not be happy. But at least I'll be okay. That's all we really need right? To know that we'll be okay?

On that note, would it be nice to know that my hard work in finding a job is paying off? Absolutely. Would it be nice to not have any more car troubles for awhile (since I've, ya know, had my fair share recently)? Definitely. So, if you think of it, could you throw in a prayer that I find a job soon? I know there are so many people out there who need your prayers more than I do, but if you think of it, I would really appreciate it. Thanks!

Tuesday, January 20, 2009

missing this kid right now








Where you used to be, there is a hole in the world,
which I find myself constantly walking around in the daytime,
and falling in at night. I miss you like hell.

Edna st. vincent millay

new beginning

"Today I say to you that the challenges we face are real. They are serious and they are many. They will not be met easily or in a short span of time. But know this, America - they will be met. On this day, we gather because we have chosen hope over fear, unity of purpose over conflict and discord."

-PRESIDENT Barack Obama!

Saturday, January 17, 2009

i gave myself a new goal

So...in the spirit of losing weight, and to give myself an incredibly motivating factor, I have come up with a new goal for myself. Well, I guess not so much a goal as it is a wonderful gift to myself for losing weight =P I know, I know...there should be other motivating factors (and there are) but this one, my friends, takes the cake.

Now, a little dilemma I seem to have (and I'm pretty sure I'm not alone in this) is that I always tend to buy cheap jeans. Not super cheap but cheap enough that after awhile, holes seem to pop up in certain, unmentionable places. I've known for a long time that I just need to bite the bullet and buy some really nice (and, unfortunately, expensive) jeans. I bought a pair of silvers in high school that are fantastic and, had I not broke the zipper off (*clarification* NOT because I was too fat but because I pulled too hard and pulled the little dangly thing off--yes, I'm that smart) I would still be wearing today. And they weren't even too expensive--maybe $50-60. And by "not too expensive", I mean in terms of jeans I own that have lasted. I tend to buy my jeans from Aeropostale--they're almost always on sale, I can get them for under $20 typically and they're super comfy. But they're sooo thin that after 9-12 months, the holes creep up.

(Ok Melanie..get to the point already!) Therefore, my "I lost all my goal weight so I get a present!" present is...dun dun dun...

A PAIR OF WILLIAM RAST JEANS!

Who, you say? Well, William Rast is the company that Justin Timberlake started with his friends--their jeans are super cute and super good quality---I've admired them from afar for quite some time! They're also pretty spendy. I think they're all pretty much in between $200 and $250 (the ones I want are $209--so at least they're on the cheaper side!) I know that that is a ridiculous amount of money to spend on jeans--but, hey, at least I can admit it right? And, (I'm justifying for myself right now), I could go buy a pair of True Religion jeans--and those are upwards of $3-400!

Now, before you say "and where's
that money going to come from Mrs. Unemployed?" I say to you: I can't buy a pair of William Rast jeans until I can fit into a size 6--so, needless to say, I have some weight to lose. I'm imagining (even if I work super hard) it's going to take many many months--and trust me, if I'm still unemployed many many months from now, I'll be in an insane asylum because I. will. be. going. crazy. So, cross your fingers, I'll have been employed for quite some time and have built up some savings, paid off my credit cards and Pierre-Marc Bouchard, and will be able to afford my awesomely, wonderful, so-excited-for William Rast jeans!

Now if
that doesn't motivate me...I don't know what will!

quick prayer request

Kelly over at Kelly's Korner (a blog I frequent!) was induced at 40.5 weeks this morning (well, Friday morning I suppose, since this will post on Saturday morning technically). Harper Brown was born at almost 10 lbs! Unfortunately, she's having trouble breathing and could really use your prayers! She's in critical condition down at a Children's Hospital (I believe) in Arkansas...she was airlifted after birth--she's been intubated and, at first, her parents didn't receive very favorable news. Since then, baby Harper's prognosis has seemed to improve very slightly but I'm sure any prayer you could offer up, they would appreciate! Head over to Kelly's blog to get updates on this beautiful little blessing! And if you could throw in a prayer for Kelly too--she lost a lot of blood during delivery..thanks!

While you're there, you might see some postings about her friend Jenna who delivered Brayden a couple days ago--he's also in the NICU in Arkansas--his lungs stopped developing at 36 weeks...if you could pray for this family as well, I know the thoughts and prayers would be appreciated! I know it's a lot to ask but you all know that prayer can create miracles!

Thursday, January 15, 2009

picture BONANZA!!

*edit* If you can't see the full picture (i.e. words or what not), just click on it and it will come up bigger :)
Sooo...I haven't posted pictures in a LONG time!! (Which, by the way, is very odd for me!) Therefore, I present to you, a picture bonanza!
(fyi, when I decided to call this post 'picture bonanza', I had a million more pictures planned to upload...but unfortunately my computer is being unnecessarily slow and it's taking forever and a day to upload pictures. Must be that -22 degree weather--it's making everything slow!)
Anyways, the picture above and the picture below are two of my ABSOLUTE favorite pictures of Cole. The top picture is hilarious--the caption just came to me and it fit and made me laugh so hard. Heck, who am I kidding, it still makes me laugh when I see it. The one right below this is the polar opposite--so sweet and innocent! It's one Stef took (I prefer editing Stef's pictures--or Christie's--of Cole and Kennedy because their cameras are so much better and the photos are better quality). Anyway, Stef took this photo and I effectively stole it :) (but don't worry, she loves it when I do that!) and I just so happened to be playing around with the new picnik effect and found the clone one. Great timing--this picture is just so absolutely adorable!
This picture is one of my faves as well (get used to hearing, er, reading that--i tend to have a lot of favorites). When babies are still babies, one of my favorite things about them are their tiny baby feet--I loooove photographing baby feet! (Or in this case, editing the picture Stefanie photographed!) These are little miss Kennedy's feet and I just love them!
Another one of my favorite things (see?) is making up what Cole and Kennedy would be saying could they say things...
The second I saw these two pictures on Stef's camera, I knew that I could do something really cool and cute with them...and what do you know...well, you tell me...cute? (Cuz it's, ya know...one of my favorites)
My newest, or should I say, most recent, fascination editing pictures is scenery pictures or any type where I can use song lyrics or quotes to get my point across...the next few fall under that category...



And sometimes, I simply just love pictures with my friends :)


Dole=Ellie's version of Cole, as I'm sure you all figured out...
And this is Cole's most recent self-portrait. The funniest thing about Cole and a camera is that, literally, the second I walk in the door and set down my purse, Cole is looking in it for my camera. How do I know he's looking for my camera? Because the second a) I give it to him or b) he finds it, he gets a huge grin on his face and doesn't bother with my purse the rest of the night. Oh yeah, and I find about 300 pictures of him (or something) on my camera at the end of the night. (and no, i'm not exaggerating when I say 300!)


Hope you enjoyed!

Wednesday, January 14, 2009

conflicted

Soo...I'm feeling lame even writing this but I'm going to anyways. One of my goals in life is to write a novel. (Oh, and did I forget to mention that I want to get it published?) Not very many people know that.

Now...the thing is, I have no idea what I want to write about. I could write for years if I was given the opportunity. I mean, really...if I didn't have to work (or in my case right now, find a job) in order to pay my bills, I would really just sit and write. I have a million things to write about. But none of those things actually involve other people, ya know, reading them.

On that note...what should I write about? Do I want to write a romantic novel? A comedy? A story (loosely) based on my life or a part of my life? A real life experience? Do I want to write a mystery? I mean, I really just don't know. I have so many ideas milling around in my head but no inclination as to which way to take one of those ideas.

Sooo...what do YOU think? Romance? Comedy? Mystery? All of the above? None of the above?

And also...ya never know...you might just end up in it ;)

Monday, January 12, 2009

Job 1:21

Watch this video. I guarantee you, you will *not* be able to get through it without crying.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=th6Njr-qkq0

Sunday, January 11, 2009

random

My friend recently tagged me in her post of random things. Basically, what you do is just write a bunch of random things (that people may or may not) know about you. You can be completely serious, absolutely hilarious and 100% open. Feel free to share as much (or as little!) as you want! When you're done making your list, go ahead and tag some of your own friends that you want to learn more about!

  1. I cry hysterically every single time I watch Ladder 49.
  2. I feel like I'm destined for great things--I just falter when figuring out what they are and how to accomplish them.
  3. I was put on this Earth to be a wife and a mom.
  4. I miss my college friends more than anything.
  5. I really prayed for the first time last night and it felt great!
  6. I usually feel like a skinny girl in a fat girls body--and this year I'm going to do everything I can to change that.
  7. If I could be best friends with any celebrity, it would be Amanda Bynes.
  8. If I could go back to the beginning of college, I would major in marine biology and be an animal trainer.
  9. I would jump for joy if Bob from The Biggest Loser was my personal trainer.
  10. I love love love the Manning brothers vs. Williams sisters commercials. (Ya know, the press conference ones? "Yeah? Well my brother and I would like to announce that it's on like donkey kong!")
  11. I've started to cut my portions when I eat and I can already tell a difference.
  12. Next step: cutting out junk food and drinking more water.
  13. The main reason (outside of the obvious) that I want a job is so i can get a health club membership and start working out.
  14. I have my first four kids names picked out (yes, I said first four) and I've had them picked out for quite some time.
  15. I'm getting better at sticking to a budget.
  16. I hope and pray that Alyssa gets into the U for next year.
  17. On that note, I'm really excited to live with Alyssa when she comes home!
  18. I know I could be a really great girlfriend.
  19. I cry really easily. During tv shows, movies, blogs, the news...heck, even during tv commercials and songs.
  20. I like to criticize myself before other people get the chance.
  21. I'm afraid of getting my heart broken.
  22. Jennie Garth is one of my favorite actresses.
  23. I wish I could have a hundred kids and a hundred animals so I could use all the names I love.
  24. Sometimes I wish I had blue eyes.
  25. But usually I love my brown eyes.
Alright, friends, I'm tagging: Stefanie, Christie, Caela (who probably won't do this), Leslie, and Alison! Have fun!

Tuesday, January 6, 2009

Life is a journey...it can take you anywhere you choose to go

I came to a realization today. And it's something I've known for a long time--I just chose to ignore it.

I try to take the easy way out.
Every single time.

That stops today.

The year 2009 is the year I will look back on and remember as the year I changed my life and became the person I always wanted (and knew I could) be.

I will work hard to find a job. I will lose weight. I will become healthier. I will pay back 'Pierre-Marc Bouchard'. I will pay off my credit cards entirely. I will give my all in everything. I will give myself over to God completely. I will make things happen for myself instead of expecting someone else to do it for me. I know I can do it.


Starting tomorrow.
Just kidding :)


December 31, 2009, I will look back
on this post and I will be able to say
the words "I did it." And that will feel phenomenal.

Saturday, January 3, 2009

could be luck

So...I feel a little trivial asking for prayers on such an insignificant thing. On the other hand, if this actually works out, it could be really beneficial and help me in numerous ways. As you know, I got into a car accident the day before Christmas Eve...my car cost in between $3-4,000 to fix--i.e. more than it's actually worth. Therefore, I decided it would be better to just get a new car since it was going to be so expensive to fix anyways. Thanks to an anonymous, very generous person, I didn't have to take out a loan to get a new car. This person--let's call them Pierre-Marc Bouchard (what? I'm watching the Wild and I couldn't come up with anything better!) offered to loan me some money to pay for a car, interest free.

Now comes the trivial prayer part. I went car shopping with my dad today--he had found a Cougar (which, by the way, I was
in love with in high school!) that was a pretty good deal. It was all the way out in Cambridge (which is part of the reason why it was so cheap). Anyways, we went and looked at it today and I fell in love with it. Dad told me not to get attached but what can I say...it's just so pretty! Anyways, the car was listed at $1995--they sold it to me for $1800. So, after taxes and title, I paid $1900 for it. Not too shabby. I bought it--contingent upon it "passing" a check with dad's mechanic. Provided nothing too drastic (within a few hundred dollars) needs to be fixed, we'll keep the car. If it needs a ton of work and I'll have to put another thousand into it, we give it back. :( We don't want that! We want to keep this car! haha It does need a new windshield--it has a crack in it right now. It's a pretty big crack in that it kind of is in a 'U' shape but it's on the passenger side so it's not something that NEEDS to be fixed before I can drive it. (side note: numerous people have told me to just wait until I get my insurance figured out and see if I have windshield coverage and then just to tell them that a rock popped up so I don't have to pay for it--but is it really ok to ask God to let me have this car and then say I'm going to "cheat" the insurance company in the same sentence??) But even if I paid for that, it's in between $1-200...which isn't too bad either.

SO (by this point I'm sure you're asking yourself, 'alright...so what exactly do you want me to pray for Mel?') Well...it has some troubles starting up. Apparantly someone test drove it before us and it worked just fine. Go figure. The car wouldn't start when we went to start it up--they jumped it and thought it might be the battery. So they put in a brand new battery (bonus, right?) but it still had troubles starting. I have to push the gas down for it to start and then rev the engine for a little while. Sometimes it's good to go after that. But sometimes it still stalls--when this happens, if I just try to start it like normal, then it will start. And once it's started, it works just fine. BUT that whole "doesn't start properly" issue has me a little worried. It could be any number of things--from something small like a valve loose to something big like possible engine work (although no one seems to think this is the issue--I just always assume the worst!) So, after this great big novel, what I'm asking is that you all pray that Tom finds nothing else wrong with this car--that this issue of it not starting is something that's small, fixable, and
relatively cheap.

I really really really love this car--like
seriously fell in love with it (Anne was laughing at me because I kept staring at it). It was such a great deal and I think I would be hard-pressed to find another deal like this one. Not to mention the fact that I would only need to borrow about $500 from Pierre-Marc Bouchard. (I can pay for this car all by myself--however, it would leave my checking, savings, and investment accounts completely dry and I still do have bills to pay--stupid student loans!) So provided I find a job within the next few weeks, I could pay back that $500 really fast!

Anyways, any conversations with the big guy would be really helpful and I would really appreciate it--although I do know that there are
many more important things to talk to Him about. Thanks!